The Worst TV Science Fiction Shows

Jerry Taylor over at Geekend loves, it would seem, to start flame wars. He has put together a list of what he suggests are the worst science fiction television shows EVER! Now I will give you the list, refresh your memory and add my comments or not, but I would be interested in what you folks think or if you have better suggestions. Now, no fair just flaming, if your going to say a show rots, back it up and we will talk about it on the next program. NO FLAMES!

Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea

Voyage was broadcast on ABC from September 14, 1964 to March 31, 1968, and was the product of the science fiction schlock master Irwin Allen. The series tells the adventures of the crew of the Seaview, a nuclear powered submarine designed by Admiral Harriman Nelson (Richard Basehart) and commanded by Captain Lee Crane (David Hedison).

What is truly amazing is that this show was the longest running science fiction series of the 1960’s on American television. And lest we forget, Allen also made those fine science fiction series Lost in Space, The Time Tunnel and Land of the Giants. (Now I watched this as a 10 year old so it was magic to me. I would make almost ANYTHING into a sub and spend long hours cruisin the depths. Was it bad? Looking back...a bit, but the remake? total waste of time)

Manimal

The creation of Glen Larson, this series features our action here Jonathan Chase (Simon MacCorkindale), who can turn into animals to fight crime. Usually it is either a hawk or panther with the same exact backdrops every time; but, when he changed into a bull, dolphin and horse, it was off-screen.

Thankfully, this nightmare of cheap special effects only lasted from 30 September to 17 December 1983. Larson was also responsible for those excellent serious serious offenders such as Knight Rider, Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, the original BattleStar Gallactica and Night Man. (dead on here, I watched this maybe twice and it sucked. Knight Rider I watched a couple of times but that's one more time than the remake as well as Buck and the little robot that looked like a walking dildo, have to disagree on BSG, a bit slocky maybe but the stuff that worked was the stuff that is still working for the remake. Though if they had the present day Cylons back then I probably would have pissed myself. Night Man?! did ANYONE watch that crap?)

Airwolf

Donald Bellisario, told us of the adventures of series protagonist Stringfellow Hawke (Jan Michael Vincent), his crew chief Dominic Santini (Ernest Borgnine) tooling about in their an advanced supersonic helicopter with stealth capabilities and a formidable arsenal.

Having killed off the interesting arch-villain and all around American utter bastard Dr. Charles Henry Moffet (David Hemmings) in the series opener, it quickly devolved to flying Airwolf around, blowing up stuff and then flying home. One of the best TV series lines of all times is Moffet’s “There’s nothing wrong with a little perversion, Mark,” said to a crew person, “so long as you don’t hurt yourself.”

Bellisario later went on to make Quantum Leap, which more than makes up for this show. (Air Wolf I did watch, not sure why. I think by this time I was getting lazy in my sci-fi watching and the constant buzzing was a good way to phaze out. But the show was stupid and the only thing I wanted to see was the chopper. Quantum Leap, for some reason everyone loved and I never "got" the show. The premise never worked for me. I totally dissed the original run and only watched it later in syndication on Sci-fi. )

Star Trek: Enterprise

The brain child of Brannon Braga and Rick Berman, we follow the adventures Captain Jonathan Archer (Scott Bakula) depicts the mostly human crew zipping about the galaxy at Warp Factor 5. The crew faces situations which have been encountered numerous times on other Trek series, but are new for them. The producers had the final laugh when it was revealed the last episode, These Are The Voyages… (and possibly the whole series) was a holo desk presentation being watched by Commander Riker and Deanna Troi! Low ratings killed the series after 4 seasons and may well have finally made any potential new Trek show in the future impossible - an ugly, ugly end for the franchise. (Did I ever buy Bakula as a captain of an Enterprise? Not completely, but calling the show a running joke is harsh. I was really regular at watching this program, though once I knew it was canceled I kinda lost heart. I never really picked up on ST-TNG in its first run because of the was it was marketed. The stations in my area didn't pick up on it and the Fox affiliate ran whatever it felt like which meant...you guessed it. No Star Trek. But calling Enterprise one of the worst? ummm nope, not when the greatest American Hero didn't make this list? or Time Tunnel? Or Land of the Giants? There are so many that calling this one bad is just to damn narrow)

Holmes and Yo-Yo

Brought to us in 1976 by ABC, Holmes and Yoyo is the tales of Detective Alexander Holmes (Richard Shull), NYC detective who is constantly getting his partners injured, so the department assigns him Gregory Yoyonivich (John Schuck), a good natured, slightly clumsy sidekick, who just happens to be a robot. The series featured a constant set of jokes about Yo-Yo’s constant malfunctions, inability to fully comprehend humans; while, they treated the depicted crimes seriously. Not to be confused with the John Amos and Ernest Borgnine Future Cop, which managed to earn distinction when Harlan Ellison successfully sued for stealing ideas from his work; this series well earned its place on the list. (ehhh one of the worst? He's right, Future Cop was grade a trash, but this was harmless fun like Hermie on Get Smart. I had trouble for years taking Schuck seriously because of this show. This is like an ehhh...I guess)

Automan

Automan featured police officer and computer expert Walter Nebicher (Desi Arnaz, Jr.), who had created an artificially intelligent crime fighting program that generated a hologram (Chuck Wagner) able to leave the computer world and enter reality to help fight crime. Automan could turn into all manner of everyday objects such as a Lamborghini Countach, helicopter, 18-wheeler, etc., while surrounded by a nimbus of wonky blue light and totaling violating all known laws of physics. This disaster ran for 13 episodes before being condemned to the dust bin. (ok, yeah, I don't think I watched all 13, I may have but then I don't remember the 18 wheeler so maybe I missed a few. Arnaz actually carried his part off I think. Always amazed geekie, but I also always knew it was a Tron rip. Have you seen it in rerun? That hair! Those clothes! unreal!)

Space 1999

Moonbase Alpha stuck on the moon, which has been blown out of Earth Orbit by an accident with nuclear waste being stored on it. Commander John Koenig (Martin Landau), Doctor Helena Russell (Barbara Bain), Professor Victor Bergman (Barry Morse) and other notables went from pondering deep universal questions to suffer through horrible scripts that were generated with the arrival of Fred Freiberger. (now Space is on this list because of the last season with Freiberger who every sci-fi tv fan knows is the killer of all we hold dear, but the basic show held me. I loved Landau, Bain, and Morse and I let it slide that anything that would blow the moon out of orbit would have plowed it into Earth first and at the very least broken the body into millions of parts. But I waited for that next season that never came. The level of special effect for that program were amazing for the day. Freiberger didn't do it any favors, but the worst? naaaaaaaa)

Logan’s Run

Lasting one season of 14 episodes, rogue Sandman Logan 5 (Gregory Harrison), Runner Jessica 6 (Heather Menzies) and their faithful android companion REM (Donald Moffat) travel towards Sanctuary post-apocalyptic America, while avoiding their dogged pursuer Sandman Francis (Randolph Powell). The series should be applauded for managing to use nearly every sci fi convention in a such a short run; however the beer budget special effects and wooden dialogue (shamefully written by such greats as D.C. Fontana, Harlan Ellison and William F Nolan) nearly outdoes Irwin Allen’s efforts in making truly bad television! (I used to love seeing the big names roll up for this program but this was one show that just never did anything for me. I never bought into the premise. I could never understand the motivation of the hunter, it never made any sense that he would pursue them like the FBI agent in the old Fugitive. The movie had it own really dumb moments - ice robot anyone? - and this show is one I have to agree, pretty bad)

Crusade

the series tells the story of Captain Matthew Gideon (Gary Cole) and the crew of IAS Excalibur’s search for a cure to the Drakh nanoplague that has been released on Earth, after the end of the Shadow War. TNT killed the series after 13 episodes were produced, but before any were aired. Due to the episodic nature of the B5 world, the series is a failure due to the extended time given to character development and unanswered questions. Frankly, after several more bad movies, I hope JMS will just let the B5 universe alone for awhile. (anyone? never saw this. )

Kolchak: The Night Stalker

ABC having made one of the greatest and scariest horror movies ever made for TV, decided to do a series about our intrepid, bumbling, cynical Independent News Service reporter hero Karl Kolchak (Darren McGavin). Between bamboozling his editor Tony Vincenzo (Simon Oakland) about which story he is actually reporting on, fending off the snide commentary and underhanded attacks of Ron Updyke (Jack Grinnage) and dealing with corrupt city officials while trying to get to the real story; he has to deal with all manner of various supernatural predators. (said to be the inspiration to the X Files but based on an unbelievable premise....come on! yeah the movie was better. Umm that's usually the way it works. This show put Darren McGavin on the map as far as I am concerned. Was it science fiction? NO it was a monster show, that being said, I never missed an episode)

Misfits of Science

The series detailed the madcap adventures of a group of super-powered humans. Led by Dr. Billy Hayes (Dean Paul Martin, Dino’s son who tragically died in a National Guard F-4 Phantom fighter jet crash in California’s San Bernardino Mountains during a snowstorm in 1987) and featuring such diverse actors as Courteney Cox (Friends), Kevin Peter Hall (who was the dude in the Predator suit in the first film if ya didn’t know) and Mickey Jones (where he played kick butt take no names Chris Faber in the V miniseries), the series was played for laughs, which were all too few. Ultimately, it was done in by J.R. as it was playing in the same time slot as Dallas. (again: anyone? I never watched it....looked stupid and mostly was I surmise. Didn't know the Predator stuff though. cool. but hell yess, trash)

V: The Series

Kenneth Johnson (who also gave us the The Incredible Hulk) took the interesting premise of his Nazi allegory V and turned it into a weekly soap opera that reads like a mash-up of The Fugitive and Star Trek, without bothering to have any good scripts! Watching Mark Singer and Jane Badler spout bad dialogue fully explains the utter look of disgust on Michael Ironside’s face every time you see him in the background of a scene. (Ditto. For some reason seeing Michael Irosides in this show didn't work for me. I guess maybe you could tie it into the way he trashed his career in the old Battlestar Galactica. I didn't care for him there either. But Nazis? I never got that vibe once! Anyone else? I just thought bad special effects, all the aliens look human. Eat mice and bad vocal track. ehh. I lost interest fast.)

The Starlost

This series about Devon (Keir Dullea) and his adventures on the Ark. Lasting 16 episodes which were broadcast on CTV and syndicated to a few US stations, the plots and acting were so bad that Twentieth Century Fox, executive producer Douglas Trumball, writer Harlan Ellison and Ben Bova, all disavowed the show.

Little seen for years, the series is finally being released on DVD on September 30^th, 2008, which you might miss in all the excitement of the Iron Man DVD release. (Never seen this one either, but if someone said Ellison and Bova in the same sentence I would have gone for 1 at least)

Ok, so, lets get a list together of what you thought were rank terrible or why these are or are not.

Oh and you will want to go over to Geenend for the complete article. I have only put up the highlights