Sunday, March 25, 2012

Has Your Brain Been Hacked?

In my mailbox today comes a message from Ron. Now Ron is certainly that counter influence in a world that is trying desperately trying to find equilibrium. Ron's message contains nothing but two enigmatic addresses. So what am I supposed to do with this info...? huh? Walk away? Oh fat chance! Nyet! Nein! I am in the deap end of the pool feet first before you can say AVG....

It would seem that several years ago, there was a burgeoning industry catering to potential customers who were concerned that their cerebral tissue was under surveillance or outright attack. To that end the first place I visited was the (quite possibly with tongue firmly planted in cheek) AFDB or the Aluminum Foil Deflector Beenie. Touted as An Effective, Low-Cost Solution To Combating Mind-Control. We are treated to what an AFDB is to detailed instructions for building your own. I am especially keen on the construction page's step seven which gives instructions in easily to follow pictographs detailing affixing the AFDB to your cranium. There is even an AFDB Usage and Maintenance section! A truly brilliant and well thought out site.

The next url took me to Mind Guard subtitled psychotronic mind control protection. Glad I got that cleared up. Again we are served (pun? what pun) up either a brilliantly funny page or an insanely paranoid page. Mind Guard is computer software it would seem which is proudly touted as software for the Amiga and now Linux (Use Linux because THEY don't want you to)

Here is a piece of paranoid brilliance from the MindGuard page:

  • MindGuard offered Amiga-using paranoids the world over a new opportunity to think free of evil influences using advanced Active Anti-Psychotronic (AAP) software, theretofore only available to mind-control agents and paranoid millionaires.
Oh my,  the person who set up the MindGuard page needs to gets some sort of award.  It IS that wildly entertaining (oh that's going to get me letters) and so full of boogah boogah  gona getya wonderfulness that I am sure you will be able to find much more than I did with just a cursory looktru.  Check both of the sites out and see what you can glean.  Enjoy


4 comments:

Ron Huber said...

Standard MindGuard shielding generates tuned anti-signals to jam incoming oppressor signals.

However, they are vulnerable to massed assault by tuned psychotronic carrier signals, which can selectively focus dozens of mind controlling waves on a single small area of the aluminate shield, forcing its mind controlling signalware through the barrier and into the hapless victim.

Good news! Using foil from chewing gum wrappers*, carefully stitched together with silk thread, a superior Mindguard cranial defense unit (CDU) is formed. The bonding of the sugars, xanthins and other organic molecules with the aluminate on the assembled gum wrappers creates, once heat & salt are supplied to it by the defended scalp, a sentient biofilm.

These "smart" CDUs continually measure the level of brainhacking signals received throughout the biofilm. They then are able to immediately strengthen aluminate density at any location, blocking mass oppressor waves attacks.

So gum up your oppressors!

Beam Me Up said...

sugars and salt creating a sentient bio - film

better and better

Ron Huber said...

Its the gum that makes the difference. As scalp skin cells shed, they embed into the gum molecules and ferment with the sugars.

Beam Me Up said...

ok, but fermentation insinuates that either alcohol or acidic acid had built up due to microbial biological action. These compounds are waste products and as such do not promote intelligence. In fact it would almost infer a cranium with depositions of waste. Better known as a S..t head or an A.. Hole when dealing with the complete system.